COLTS!!

Once upon a time, there lived a quarterback who could beat every team in the land. Except for one. It was led by the evil prince Tom who used his handsomeness to cast spells of snow and rain, and was rewarded with many rings for his fingers. Then one fortunate day, the quarterback discovered that the prince had a secret weapon called an "effective defense." The quarterback had only been given a "mediocre defense," which could not fight the power of prince Tom's handsomeness. So the quarterback secretly switched his defense with that of the prince, and lo and behold...

Peyton Manning defeats Brady's Pats 40-21.

And they all lived happily ever after. At least in Indianapolis.